My addiction to Facebook

I just realized something, it's been over a week since I put a post on here, but I've been on my computer constantly. Why is that? I am an addict. I am addicted to Facebook. And I don't really know why.

I like to have interaction with my friends and co-workers. I like to be proactive and talk with them when I chose to. I love writing my blog, but all I feel like I do is drone on and on about something that is usually unimportant and then wait for someone to comment. On most posts I only get 1 or 2 comments, and I get so disappointed. I really don't get how people can get so many people to comment on their blogs. One blog I read is call NormalMormonHusbands and his posts generate over 100 comments. Of course his blog is much more entertaining than mine, but I don't even think my mother reads my blog. Basically I'm saying: my audience is small and my interaction with them is very limited. I love facebook because I can go online and see what my friends are doing or saying about themselves, and then I can interact with them if I chose to. And I can see so many more people. I looked up my high school graduating class, and got to read about so many people from high school. I thought this was really cool, until I realized that so many people have accomplished so much, and I have really accomplished so little in comparison. I don't recommend look up old classmates, it can get rather depressing.

So, you ask what did I do tonight? I chatted with a good friend about everything under the sun, and wasn't limited by the telephone. I could get up and tuck Kolbie into bed, use the bathroom, and brush my teeth, and it didn't interrupt my conversation at all. It was great. And when I say I talked to her all night, I really mean it. We started chatting at about 6pm and I logged of after 10 because I had to go to bed (what a joke that turned out to be, it 1:25am and I'm still not asleep)!

Greg asked me Sunday afternoon if there was a 12-step program for people who are addicted to Facebook, and "could we find a meeting or something to go to". What a funny guy. Right now, I like my little addiction to Facebook. My experience has been great (other than looking up old classmates). So keep up with Facebook, I really enjoy it. And you may also comment here too, I really enjoy that. It lets me know that someone reads my ramblings.

I Dance Like Elaine

So, last night for Valentines Day Greg and I...went to a church dance. I had a good time, but it was a little weird seeing a member of the Stake Presidency waltz to the Electric Slide.

We have some good friends from our ward that were at the dance, and it was fun. But it brought back a lot of unpleasant memories. I am not a social person, I stress out every time I'm put into a "social" setting. I ALWAYS say the first thing that pops into my head (see: I think I'll shut-up now post), and that has made for some interesting social "situations".

The biggest problem that I had on Saturday Night was: I DON'T DANCE!!!! Not around people anyway. I was the kid in dance class that was always on the back row half way off the stage for dance recitals, and I NEVER went to school dances. I do dance in my kitchen when I listening to my ipod, and I disco when my girls are dancing in the living room, but I only do that because of the reaction I get from them (Kolbie joins in, but Katie look at me like I've got lobsters crawling out my ears). The funniest thing about going to the dance last night was, Greg can't dance either. In fact, he stepped on my feet so much that they still hurt. Greg and I joked that we dance like Elaine. I don't remember what kind of party that Elaine, Jerry, Kramer, and George were at but Elaine was dancing.

George said: "Have you seen Elaine dance? It's like watching a full body dry heave."

That about sums up my dancing style. I'm too reserved and up-tight. I just can't relax in situations like that. I wish I was one of those people that could just relax and have fun, but I just can't. I'm just like my dad that way, my mom could let loose and have fun, but not my dad. I think my mom even won a dance contest she joined with my grandpa. I don't know what happened to me and my dad though, his mom (my Grandma Kate) used to tell me about when she and grandpa would put the kids to bed early then they would push all the furniture out of the way and they would dance all night. I think that sounds so fun, but Greg and I dance like Elaine, besides we would miss some sporting event on TV.

It was fun to watch our friends at the dance. I could just picture everyone as teenagers, and we still are the same people we were then. Here are some funny things I noticed:

Boys still pretend they can slam-dunk basketballs.

There is still the weird guy that dances wild-and-crazy and everyone watches, but he's having the most fun.

There is the couple that can dance really, really well. And everyone is jealous (or maybe it was just me).

There is the couple that hardly ever dances, but knows everyone and spends the entire time talking with friends.

A member of what I call "The Leadership Team" still walks around to make sure no one is making-out in the corner.

It takes about an hour before many will loosen up and go out and dance. Greg and I got there about 45 minutes late on purpose!

There's is still the person that can't dance, but tries. -- That's me. :)

One of the most interesting places to "people watch" is at a church dance. It's interesting to see who will fill what role.

I would go to dance lessons if the ward or stake had them, but yoga class would be safer for everyone involved. :)

I need some advice

I know that I tend to be overly serious, but I need some help.

I'm a Mother. I have the three best kids in the world. They amaze me, and scare me. Last night Chris (he's 13) started asking questions. TOUGH QUESTIONS!!! Questions that don't have easy answers.

I don't think questions are bad. Accepting answers, that's hard. During our discussion with Chris yesterday, he cried. At first this bothered Greg, but it just makes me love Chris more. He is very genuine. He has a very tender heart.

How do I help Chris understand that everyone sins? How do I help him understand that because we all sin, we are all more alike than different? How do I help him understand that when God looks at his children, he doesn't see all our faults, but sees all our potential? How do I help a child understand principles that I don't really grasp myself?

I openly admit that I have had (and am currently experiencing) a trial of faith. I seem to have more questions than answers these days. I can tell that Greg is frustrated, and I fear that my stubbornness is hurting my children. Maybe my ignorance is what's really the problem. Why didn't I prepare for the day when my kids ask questions with impossible answers? I knew this day would come, and I feel so unprepared!

I think I'll shut-up now

Anyone who has known me for any amount of time (like a second and a half) knows that I can be very outspoken and opinionated. I also have an amazing ability to stick my foot in my mouth. I have some stories that would curl your hair!

There was the time when Greg and I were eating dinner with his parents (about 2 weeks before our wedding) and I quoted a line from The Christmas Story. Ralphie's dad had just gotten his "major prize" and Ralphie was saying how much he loved that lamp. "It was electric sex glowing in the window." I will NEVER forget the look on Sharron's face. EVER!

Then today, I went to lunch with a friend from work. We were talking about the big Michael Phelps scandal.

Please keep in mind this simple equation: Jill + sports + opinion = DISASTER!!

JILL: Did you hear about Michael Phelps?

FRIEND: Yeah, I can't believe it.

JILL: It didn't surprise me.

SIDEBAR: Anyone, and I mean ANYONE that is continually told how wonderful they are will eventually fall on their face. HARD! That kid has been set up for disaster for years! Guess what? Michael Phelps made a bad choice. We all do. He just had the privilege to screw up in front of the whole world. I feel bad for him.

FRIEND: What do you mean?

JILL: Well, you know he was arrested for drunk driving when he was 19 right?

FRIEND: Yeah, I know that. But, I was arrested for drunk driving too. That doesn't make him a bad person.

CRAP!!!!

That is not what I meant, but looking back I can see where she's coming from. I am an idiot!

I also recently told a friend that I thought she was weird because she liked being pregnant. Then I told her that she shouldn't worry about what I think about her. Again, not what I meant. The problem is this friend doesn't really know me well enough to know that I tend to speak and then engage my brain. Sorry--you know who you are.

To be honest, more than one person has been offended beyond repair because of my big fat mouth, and I feel like I've suffered because I don't have these friends.

Greg has learned to deal with my "problem" very well over the years. He doesn't even act embarrassed anymore (most of the time), and frequently he doesn't even say anything to me. He already knows how crappy I feel because I usually figure out that I've screwed up on my own. After all this time, Greg usually just laughs, shakes his head and walks away. He's a very good sport about everything, unless I really out-do myself. The thing that amazes me about what a great sport he is, is the fact that I really don't try very hard to censor myself when I'm around family (his or mine). I think I like the shock factor.

This character trait is something that I think is funny or quirky in other people, but I HATE IT ABOUT MYSELF!!! I also thought that I would grow out of it as I got older. Boy, was I wrong!! The older I get the worse it is. If things don't change soon, I'm going to be a lonely old woman with a lot of cats. Maybe age = honesty?

STORY: At work, I was given the responsibility to improve our break room. I spent so much time measuring, and thinking and trying to come up with ideas to make things better. Finally, 2 days before I was scheduled to make all the changes I was talking to one of my bosses and said I needed to get Greg in to look at things to give me some ideas. In my defense: Greg is very good at that kind of thing and could help me figure things out. Well, I went on to say and I quote: "...I just need the brain of a boy to help me figure this out..." My boss, his name is Dave.

Like I said, I think I'll shut-up now.