Tuesday, July 29, 2008

Hollywood, The Real Deal?

Today I was listening to The Colin Cowherd show on ESPN radio and he made a point tht I've been trying to make for several years. He was talking about how "real" movie are.

He was referencing a article by a movie critic about the move "X-Files". The critic said a scene depiciting a doctor injecting stem cells into a boys brain was "unrealistic". Really? Well, that's news.

A couple of years ago when the new Superman movie came out, I remember asking a friend if she liked the movie. She said "... it was alright. The scene where Superman saves Lois Lane from the airplane is totally unrealistic, though." OH MY GOSH!!!! Aparantley a movie about a man that choses to wear tights, flighs through the air, and has super-human strength is realistic!! Are you kidding me?

Since when has Hollywood been about being real? All you have to do is look at Pamela Anderson and know that's not true. If Hollywood was about being real, you'd seen Angelina Jolie with saggy boobs, stretch marks, and bags under her eyes because she was up all night with her newborns. Instead what do you see? You see the mother of a 12 year old that looks like Pamela Anderson!!! All you ever see from Hollywood is flat tummies, perky boobs, tight butts in clothes that cost the gross national product of some small island nations!! And the men are no better!! Go check out all the bi-ceps shown in an OK! Magazine, and then check out all the bi-ceps that are at your family reunion and you'll see what I mean.

I am so sick of people acting like Hollywood is the real deal!! Why is everyone so shocked when a star shows their true colors? Has anyone thought that maybe Jennifer Aniston is difficult to be in a relationship with? Maybe there is a stretch mark within the city limits of the Los Angeles metropolitian area!

I know that I sound bitter, maybe I am. I notice that my husband notices all those pictures of women that are either air-brushed or plastic and it bugs me. How do you compete with perfection?

Kolbie The Astronaut

Over the weekend, while we were driving from a baseball game back to our hotel, we heard Kolbie announce:

I want to be an astronaut when I grow up. Except I don't want to go to space.

Reply: Why don't you want to go to space?

Kolbie: Because I'm scared I'll lose myself in space, and that would be not cool!!!!!

All joking aside, this seems like pretty good logic to me. However, I asked Kolbie how she's going to be an astronaut and not go into space. She said:

I'll be the kind that doesn't go to space, Mom. Duh.

Gotta love that kid!

Monday, July 28, 2008

A Baseball Weekend

Well, we survived the weekend in Spanish Fork. The team played 4 hard fought games. Unfortunately, we lost all 4 games. As for Chris, I'm so proud of him, I could just explode. He's done such a good job and he didn't quit (which was a bigger deal to me than anything). He played third base, center field, catcher and pitched (and did an awesome job) in the last game. Here are some pictures:

I know I've said before that I wasn't really ready for baseball to be done (with this team at least), but I am. I think that Chris has taken about all he can from this experience. I have to saya quick thanks to Roger, Johnnie, Don and Papi. They were the coaches and scorekeeper for the team. Thank you so much.

I asked Chris what he's learned from being on this all-star team. He said "...to not be scared." That shocked me, so I asked him what he meant. He said that he knows not to be scared when he plays because the other kids he's playing against are just kids his age. He also said that he learned that he made that team for a reason. When I translate all that it tells me that he's gained confidence, and I can see it when I watch him play. He's also not the Drama King he was before (every time he got hurt he was dying -- but not as much now). He even seems happier than he did before. I think its because he's having fun. He also worships Johnnie (he loves all his coaches but really likes Johnnie), he's made learning baseball fun for Chris.

I've said before that one of my favorite things to do is watch my kids do the things that they love. Well, watching Chris play baseball makes me so happy. I can tell when I watch him play that he loves it. His love for playing comes out even more when I take him to practice and he's smiling, and even when he talks about baseball. He's such a good kid!! I love him so much! He's taught me more than I could ever teach him.

I love you buddy!!!!

Wednesday, July 23, 2008


i THOUGHT YOU WOULD ALL LIKE TO KNOW THAT MY DOCTOR GAVE THE OKAY FOR MY SPINAL CORD STIMULATOR IMPLANT!!! I'm so scared but so happy!! I'm hoping that this works so I can get my life back!!! I spoke to another patient recently that gave me some hope about the implant. She said that it was the best thing she ever did since she started having cronic pain. It sounds kind of freaky, but hopefully it will work.

Thank you for all of your kind thoughts and prayers, I would be so grateful if they would keep coming. I'm not "out of the woods" yet and could use all the help I could get.

We're having my family over for dinner and fireworks tomorrow, so I'm going to try to post pictures soon. That is a VERY big deal for me, I'm not very computer savvy.

Thanks again.

Prayers, Please

Things have been surprisingly quiet on the baseball front this week. YIPEE!!!! I must say that I'm surprised.

Right now I'm at my parents house and Dad's having a rough week. He just doesn't feel good at all. His speech is slurry, and he's even in some pain this week. The thing that is so frustrating about this #$^*$#@ disease is that you can have serious symptoms and your blood work comes back in the "normal"range. I can't tell you how angry I get when Mom tells me that all Dad's blood work is good. I don't want my dad to be sick, but he's got all these symptoms and his blood work says he's fine. I know it's the nature of the disease, but what gives?

Kolbie and I are going to go to my Doctors office is a little bit, to get my medication adjusted. I'm so tired of this ride with my pain, it sure makes the days drag on. My appointment today is to adjust my meds. I really don't get it, of course I'm depressed, this is a depressing situation. I've never been scared to tell people that I've had a life long relationship with depression, but I find that (lately) people are a little judgemental. Most people don't mean to be, but stupid things just fly out of peoples mouth.

So yes, I'm clinically depressed, I have been for most of my life. I remember being very small and feeling depressed, that's just part of who I am. Amazingly enough, the people that love me accept this part of me better than I do (most of the time, it's one of the things I hate the most about myself). I still don't understand why Greg would want to stick around, but he loves me, even if I don't understand why most of the time. So anyway, I'm going to get my meds adjusted by the dr.

I'm also going to talk to him about giving the ok for my pain implant. I asked my dr if one of his patients who has an implant if they could call me and tell me about it. So I got a call from a woman about my age. It sounds AMAZING!!!!!!! So, if I could get the doctor to give me the okay, that's the first step to get my life back.

So everyone, think good thoughts and say your prayers that 1) I can get my implants and 2) Dad can feel better (or maybe worse, so he can get his transplant).

Oh, and if you could pray for the Mets, they let first place slip from their fingers!!! They need all the help they can get!!!! They have to get to first place!!!!

Saturday, July 19, 2008

The Calm Before The Storm

This has been a weird weekend, nothings happening. No ball games, birthday parties, weddings, ect. So I've spent Saturday doing my laundry. I've had some energy and (surprise, surprise) some ambition. My definition of the laundry being done, is EVERYTHING is washed, dried, ironed and put away (including socks)! Which means my laundry is NEVER done. I've come pretty close today, but not quite finished. And unfortunately, I'll be paying for it tomorrow (today actually). It's only 7pm and I'm already in a lot of pain.

Also, we've had Connie Ficker with us this weekend while her parents are out of town. She's a good kid, and I enjoy having her around, she makes me smile.

Katie is getting ready to go to Mill Hollow on Monday, and she is so excited. She's so excited it's not bordering on annoying, but she's only 11 so she does annoying well.

Chris has spent most of the weekend hanging out with Austin, they went to the Geex Festival. It's something about video games. He bought 3 games for 10 bucks (all of them sports games--we already have a million of those), he's so excited because he got such a great deal. His sisters and I have enjoyed making fun of him because he willingly went the "Geek" Festival.

Kolbie is been playing with her best buddy Annie. She's been a little stinker about doing chores, reading and doing her math flash cards, so if anyone has any ideas about how to help with that I'd really appreciate it.

We're all looking forward to Chris' All-Star team playing in a tournament next weekend. Practices start next week. YIPEE!!!!!!!!!!! We've been so bored this week, I can't wait. I hope that none of the other families are going to make this tournament difficult because I'm really looking forward to it. I have a weird feeling because one of the other Dads asked Greg what kind of tournament it was. He was shocked when Greg told him it was a "Super League" tournament. Oh well, hopefully nothing will happen.

This has got to be the most boring blog I've ever written, there's just not much going on right now. I'm grateful for the quiet, but I'm a little nervous. You know the old saying, "...the calm before the storm..."

Thursday, July 17, 2008

Greg Gets Attacked By A Rottweiler

The other night Greg decided to take Harley (our dog) for a walk. After he had been gone for about 10 minutes, I heard the door open and Greg cussing. This shocked me, because you don't hear Greg cuss every day. I was sitting at the computer, so I turned as he walked in the kitchen and I asked him what was wrong? And something else happened that doesn't happen every day: Greg yelled at me!!

"Harley and I just got attacked by a damn Rotweiler!!!!!"

I was speechless, after a few seconds I decided I should ask what happened.

"We were walking down the street and a Rotweiller came running out of his garage toward me and Harley. Harley was going nuts, all I could do was pick him up and turn my back to the Rotweiller. He jumped on me. Luckily, his owners came and got him."

This is when I notice that Greg is covered in dirt from head to toe. It also dawns on me, at this point to ask if he's okay.

"I'm okay, except that I scrapped up my foot, but I'M FINE!!!!"

The top of his foot is all scrapped up and part of the skin under his big toe was torn off (don't ask me how that happened), but other than that he and the dog were fine. I however was a bit upset. I was ready to call the cops, but Greg stopped me. Now that I look back, I chuckle every time I think about it.

Ever since this incident Greg has invited me to go with him when he walks the dog.


Tuesday, July 15, 2008

Memory Lane...

I can't sleep so here's a new post:

When I first started blogging I thought that getting tagged was so fun, but now, not so much. But this one is fun!!


1. As a comment on my blog, post a memory that you and I share.

2. Next, re-post these instructions on your blog and see how many people leave a memory about you. If you leave a memory about me, I'll do my best to return the favor and leave a memory about you!!

I'm excited to see what happens with this -- it could be really fun!!

Monday, July 14, 2008

The Drama Continues

I'm sad to announce that the Kearns Pony All-Star Team lost their second game today, in their double elimination tournament. I know that I've said before that I'm ready for baseball to be done for the year, but really I'm not. I am however ready for the drama to be over, but unfortunately it's not.

We played the Orem B team, and I felt the teams were pretty fairly matched, but we had some key errors. Basically, they just played better than we did. Chris had an error when he was playing center, grounded out, got a single, and got hit by 2 pitches. I about went nuts when he got hit the second time, but I'm proud to announce that I kept my cool.

I am about to lose my cool with some of the parents of this team. The parents that I mentioned in my previous post, still couldn't stop the bitching. We were going to sit in the shade in center field, but this family decided to sit there as well. At first we thought that things would be okay, but then she just started running her mouth. We decided to sit down by home plate, and roast on the asphalt. I know I had a better time roasting than I would have sitting in the shade listening to her complain.

The thing that really upsets me, is that this kid played the ENTIRE GAME, but that wasn't good enough. Chris told me that this kid was complaining about his spot in the batting order. Excuse me, but WHAT??????????? I guess that it's just one of those situations that no matter what you do, you just can't win. Oh and by the way, we still lost with "the best player in the league" playing the entire game.

I did promise myself that I would try to be more positive when I was around the kids, and I feel like I did pretty well. In fact, when the President of the league showed up, I didn't even tell him how upset I was when he announced that the league was such a mess and "no one had done anything in a long time" at closing ceremonies -- Greg was the previous president. I guess I did pretty well then, but I'm doing a pretty crappy job of being positive now.

Well, Roger has give the kids the week off from practice. I'm glad, but I know that we're going to be pretty bored around here come Thursday. I have to admit, that I really enjoy being involved with this team, and their families despite obvious personality conflicts.

The team is going to play in a tournament in Spanish Fork on the 25th and 26th, and I think we're going to make a mini-vacation out of the trip. With me being down and out as far as work goes we really don't have the funds to do any major vacationing this year, so Spanish Fork, here we come. The place may never be the same again.

Tomorrow I'm going in for my Pshycological Evaluation at the doctors office so I can get my pain control implant. Please no snide remarks about my mental stability. All joking aside this entire thing freaks me out allot!! Basically the doctor will put "leads" into the space between my backbone and my spinal cord which will be attached to a device that will be implanted under my skin. Then, I can use a remote control to control the amount of pain I'm in. It sounds like something that you'd see in a bad sci-fi movie, but if it works I won't complain. I will even have to carry a card with me in the event that I ever fly (because I'll set off the alarms) or am ever in a major accident. The entire thing is really scary, but I need to get my life back. I need to get back to work, I feel allot better about things in general when I have to work. I can get really down in the dumps when I'm stuck at home all the time. Maybe that's why I love this baseball team so much.

That's my update for today. Please leave a comment, I love comments. Next up: Greg gets attacked by a Rottweiler and baseball pictures!

Sunday, July 13, 2008

All-Star Drama

After weeks of practice, Chris' baseball team has finally started playing in the All-Star Tournament. We lost our first game yesterday, and are scheduled to play again tomorrow at 1pm.

There are certain things about this team that I am getting really tired of. There is one family whose son is on the team that I am getting sick of. All they say is that he's the best player in the league (I don't agree), so he should be playing every minute of every game.

SIDEBAR: In some aspects I understand this way of thinking. I think that Chris is the best player on his team. But I'm his mother and therefore am not the most objective person to ask.

All this family does is complain. There was even an incident at the field and a fist-fight almost broke out between his players older brother and one of the coaches. I didn't witness this event, so I don't really know what happened, but I HAVE HAD ENOUGH OF THIS!!!! This kids family is very loud, so when they get upset everyone hears about it. Of course, I shouldn't judge because I can be pretty loud myself. What these people don't understand is that the rest of the team hears about it too. This attitude is bringing down not only the fans of this team, but the team itself. So much of the energy has turned negative, even Chris has commented about it.

My experience with Chris makes me believe that kids get so much pressure from their parents when it comes to sports. Unfortunately, I have put pressure on Chris when I was doing what I thought was in his best interest. He gets so down on himself when he makes errors or didn't get "the big hit". He's told me before that "...I should be getting the big hits and making the big plays, Mom." This makes me feel bad. All I've really wanted from him is to go out and have fun, make friends, and improve. Parents can really ruin sports for a kid. When Greg was president of the league he got calls from parents whose kids were in T-Ball complaining about playing time or what position their kid was playing.

All parents get too caught up in this stuff, but some parents really cross the line. All I can say is that I'm really tired of this situation. If you really think that your son is the best player on the team, then why is he on the bench? Everyone else is wrong and your right? I'm getting to the point that I want to tell these parents that if you don't like it, take him off the team. Because I sure am sick of hearing about it.

All of that being said, I don't feel like I'm perfect in any of this. I've been known to make a complete ass of myself at a ballgame or two, but I guess we're all learning. I'm trying to get better with all of this. I have made it a point to be as positive as I can with these kids, especially with Chris.

Chris has made so much improvement on this team. He's always been a bit of a Drama King when it comes to injuries. He always thinks he's dying. In fact, he pulled himself out of a game a week ago because he "hurt" his arm. Really, he just scraped his arm. He got called out in front of the entire team by Roger. When Chris told me that I was pretty upset, I admit, but just talked to Chris about the situation. Yesterday, he got hit by a pitch. Greg and I just looked at each other, hoping that he learned something. He just trotted down to first base, you could tell that it hurt but he just kept on playing. I really hope that this is a lesson that sticks. This is just one thing that has improved with Roger and Johnnie as his coaches.

Another thing that I've noticed is that he worships Roger and Johnnie. If I hear one more time "...well Mom, Roger and Johnnie said..." I think I'll go nuts. Honestly, if they told him it would improve his game to run down Main Street naked, I think he'd consider it!!! And more than anything, his confidence has improved so much. He's having so much fun, and he's learning so much!

Well, that's about all I've got to say on that subject for right now. I just hope that there's a more positive atmosphere around this team. I'm going to do my part to make that happen.

Thanks Roger, Johnnie, Don, Popi, and Travis for all your time and effort you've spent with this team. You've made a difference with my son.

Friday, July 11, 2008


I had the opportunity to spend the day with Dad and I feel that I have some things to update. First of all: I had a WONDERFUL TIME. I always do when I spend time with Dad, he's amazing.

Anyway, when he woke up this morning, it looked like we might be having really tough day. He had an errand to run that he didn't want to go and do AT ALL and he didn't feel good. His head seemed really foggy. I was even a little bit nervous to take care of him alone. I really hated feeling that way, this was my Dad for crying out loud. I just didn't know what to expect.

Well, Dad and I drove in silence to run his errand. When we got to the distination, Dad quietly got out of the car, and was directed to where we needed to be. He quietly walked into the office, signed some papers, quietly thanked everyone for their help and assistance, and quietly left the building.

After kissing Mom good-bye there was more silence in the car as we drove to Smiths to pick up something for us to eat for lunch. Dad was his regular self when it came to what I wanted for lunch. He made it pretty clear that not only did he not want me to starve, but he wanted to make sure that I had anything I wanted. I thought that was very sweet, that was the Dad that I grew up with. There were also a couple of times that I had to just keep my mouth firmly shut (something I don't do very well) and let Dad take care of some things. Like: self check-out. He doesn't like to be disturbed:>

We got back to the apartment we both ate breakfast (we were home befor 9am) and I gave Dad his first dose of medication. By the time came for he second dose he was doing much better. His head didn't seem to be in the clouds as much. Infact, he started bossing Benjamin and myself around the apartment -- we moved furniture. By the time we were done: the living room furniture had been moved, the entire apartment had been dusted and vacumed, the kitchen had been cleaned, and some of Mom's papers had been "gone through". So: I feel my day with Dad went well. By the time we left this evening Dad seemed much better. He discribed it as: "...my head has come down from the clouds."

Before I left, I went and gave Dad a hug and kiss and thanked him for letting me come up to hang around. I told him I had a great time. In my opinion any time I can spend with my dad, is time that is absolutely well spent. I told him I'll come up again next week for at least 1 day. He told me that would enough time for him to figure out another long list of chores.:>

One thing that I learned today was that things are not perfect and aren't what we'd hoped, but we adjust. In my opinion Dad's disease is progressing much faster than anyone anticipated. It totally sucks and is really SCARY!! The one person I am in total awe of when it come to this crappy situation with Dad is Mom. I always thought my mother was an amazing woman, but watching her go through all this with dad while having to try to answer questions and concerns of 4 children and 4 children -in law and 9 grandchildren takes her to a different standard. My Mom Rocks!! I know that sounds juvenile but that's the only way I can think to describe her right now. My Mom is amazing!!!

One concern we all have right now is raising money for Dad's medical expenses. We were given several gift baskets at Dad's Retirement Party for us to sell. Greg has placed it on Ebay the link is on the post from July 6th. If you all could help us put the word out we would all really appreciate it. This first basket has tickets to the Steve Miller Band concert. Like I said we have several other baskets and more are being donated daily, so if you'd be interested in donating something to add to the auction, please let us know through this blog. Also could we all please put the word out that we have these items to sell. They were all donated and Mom and Dad could use as much as they can to pay for medication, doctor, and hospital bills. I KNOW THAT WE CAN MAKE THINGS HAPPEN TO REALLY HELP DEAL WITH THE BILLS, so any little help or idea please let us know asap.

Wednesday, July 9, 2008



Monday, July 7, 2008

The Bear of Love aka:Kolbie

What a weekend! Greg put in a new dishwasher (I helped) and we didn't end up in divorce court (this is a miracle, we always fight when we do home improvements). We went and saw WALL E as a family. I liked it, I thought it was funny. And most important: KOLBIE GOT BAPTIZED!!!!!

I cannot believe that my youngest child got baptised! I am WAY too young to say that!! Anyway, Kolbie (as usual) was amazing.

She planned the entire program. She called and asked Grandma (sort of) to play to piano. She asked her Aunt Stephanie to conduct the songs. She picked: I Love To See The Temple and I Am A Child Of God.

Her cousin Mason gave a speech on Baptism. He did an amazing job! I was going to get a picture of Mason and Kolbie but I forgot (of course). He did a great job. He sat right down in front of Kolbie and talked to her about baptism, what it meant and how important it was. I cannot thank him enough, he did a great job and he made Kolbie feel special. After Kolbie was baptized my Mom and Dad gave a speech about being Confirmed and The Gift of the Holy Ghost. They were great (as usual). I am so grateful that my parents could be a part of the program. With Dad being sick, he get confused easily, he also forgets things so I was happy that he and Mom were able to contribute to the program.

After Greg and I had Katie, we thought that we were done having kids. In fact, if you were to ask us we would have told you that we were DONE HAVING KIDS!!! But then, the Spirit gave both Greg and I the feeling that we weren't done having kids, and then Kolbie became part of our family!!! Looking back, I can't even believe that I ever felt that we were all done. I have a friend that was given a blessing after one of his children were born with severe disabilities and was told that this baby was going to cement his family together. He told me after I had Kolbie that she would be the cement of our family. I know that he's right.

Kolbie was blessed with a genuinely happy and grateful personality, and I have learned and continue to learn so much from her. My Mom said in her talk at the baptism: if you only get 2 hugs from Kolbie when she sees you, she usually upset with you. Kolbie is very affectionate. Almost every night I fall asleep snuggling with Kolbie. Kolbie is also a caregiver. She HATES that I'm sick, but she takes such good care of me. She has literally held my hair back when I've been throwing up -- this just shows me how much she loves me because she has a weak stomache. She is always asking me how I feel and if I need anything. Kolbie thinks about other people before she thinks of herself allot of the time (she is a kid). She takes good care of me! My Mom and Dad call her: The Bear of Love (Bear is one of Kolbie's nicknames), there's a funny story that goes along with that name, but it completely describes Kolbie.

Kolbie is a very good friend. Her best buddy is Annie Smith, and they have been friends for almost their entire life (we have pictures of them playing as babies). Aly talks about when Kolbie was over when she was a baby, she dropped pancakes down to Annie from her high-chair. Annie and Kolbie are about as close as you can be without being sisters. Chuck and Aly joke about Kolbie being their oldest third child! We feel the same about Annie.

Kolbie is a great sister. She truly loves Chris and Kate with all her heart (even though she is yelling at them as I write this). She wants the best for them and even cries for them when they get their hearts broken. Sometimes she can be a little devil with Chris and Kate too. She does things to make them mad on purpose, then turns around with that little devil smile on her face. She knows what she's doing.

Kolbie is beautiful. Honestly, Kolbie was the most beautiful baby I'd ever seen. She was just beautiful!!!! The doctor and nurses even commented on how beautiful she was (one even told me that they're supposed to comment on how beautiful every baby is, but Kolbie was the most beautiful baby she's seen). Now that Kolbie is growing up she is still one of Gods most beautiful creations, in my opinion (along with Chris and Kate). Boy, that last line sure sounded corny, but it's true! Kolbie is my wild child when it comes to what she wears. But no matter how wild (ugly) her clothes can be she looks beautiful!

My favorite thing about Kolbie is she is always telling us she loves us. Every time she leaves the house she yells "I'm going to .....'s house. I love you Mom!!!" That makes me smile every time I hear it!!

Kolbie is so many of the things that I hope to be one day. I wish that I could tell someone I love them as easily as she does. I wish that I could smile as often as she does. I wish I could love the little things as well as Kolbie does. I wish that I could make friends the way Kolbie does. I wish that I was a happy as Kolbie is all the time.

Kolbie is the cement of our family, we all learn so much from her, and I can't imagine what life would be like if she weren't with us. Sometimes I get mad at her, and her room is NEVER clean, and she sneaks food downstairs when she shouldn't, and she tries to get out of being in trouble by batting those big beatiful eyes at us, and she blames everything on her brother, but she sure keeps us all going. I love Kolbie so much. She completes our family!!